she speaks: amanda dotter on expectations, work/life balance & authenticity
- steph nagl
- Mar 25
- 3 min read
To celebrate Women History’s Month, toth shop sat down with different women to hear their experiences, insights, and lessons on topics that matter the most.
In the workplace, women often become expert jugglers - balancing the competing demands and priorities of work, family, and self.
Amanda Dotter knows this juggling act well. She wears many hats in a day (COO of David W. Martin Law Group, adjunct professor, mom to four, wife, mentor).
Early on in her career, she recognized that she was never going to show up perfectly in all areas. That knowledge spurred her forward to show up to the best of her abilities anyway - as an employee and as a mother.
We sat down with Amanda to hear more about the realities of “doing it all” and how best to approach work/life balance from a place of authenticity.
toth shop:
How do you manage expectations, both from others and yourself, to “do it all”?
Amanda Dotter (AD):
Communication is very important. For example, talking with your spouse who is helping you at home or your supervisor or a peer at work, and having open, transparent communication about what is coming next, right? So next week, I might not be able to get the kids when I normally do from aftercare. I might not be able to go and have the lunch at school that they were planning, right? So helping get ahead of that and see those things ahead of time to manage the kids' expectations, the spouses’ expectations, colleagues at work, right making sure that they are aware and in tune with what you have going on, as well as imperative for setting expectations and managing it all.
toth shop:
how do you define work/life balance?
(AD):
It is an ongoing opportunity for people to understand more about themselves, what grounds them, and how to have that balance in life. Because as you continue to move through your career, you do have to prioritize parts in your career while still being able to find that bonding time with your family. So 10 years ago, it was very different; that was pre-COVID and there weren't the remote work options available like there is today. Work/life balance looked very different then. COVID, as awful as it was, raised a lot of awareness for people about the importance of work/life balance and what that looks like every day for people.
toth shop:
how do you show authentically in both roles - at work and at home?
(AD):
What I recommend is taking five extra minutes in the car before you walk into the office. Decompress, calm down, and refocus. Look at your priorities for the day and make sure you’re entering work with the right mindset.
Now, let’s shift to the other side of the day. After a long day in the office, you’re burnt out, tired, and dealing with whatever’s on your plate. But when you walk into your home, your kids need you, your spouse—who may have also been working all day—needs you. Before stepping into that role, take another five minutes in the car. I can’t tell you how many times my kids have come out knocking on my window, and I have to say, “Give Mommy one more minute.” That little pause helps me reset so I can be the best version of myself when I walk through that door.
toth shop:
how can companies better support women in finding work/life balance?
(AD):
A work/life balance change is needed in the workplace. I’m also an adjunct professor, and most of that career I have spent in the HR world, which is where my education and career initially started. It’s always been that when HR walks into the room, you turn around and run away because you don't want to talk to HR. I believe in what I refer to as “New Age HR.” We are in a new age of what HR is supposed to be doing. They're supposed to be helping create that whole employee experience, because it is the whole employee that's there every day at work. I encourage companies to better understand that role from an HR or a culture perspective and make sure that there are intentional things in place, so that people do have that balance. I think it's going to be critical as we continue to see this shift in our workplace community.
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